Friday, May 16, 2008

this is my official consent form

Please slap me in the face if:

a) I become one of those girls who, because she has a crush on a guy, goes along with everything he says ["that's right, we should start hanging or garrotting or impaling murderers"; "mmm, yes, cocaine isn't really addictive"] or doesn't stick up for her friends because it's him that's attacking them.

b) I ever consider working for Studylink, that evil bourgeois oppressor of the hard-working student.

c) I ever start skipping over the news of cyclones in Myanmar and earthquakes in China for the article about what Prince William's gone and done now. Easy to do. Necessary constantly to fight.

d) I start thinking that drinking so much you become comatose is funny.

e) I ever consider being a diplomat again. These last few weeks have been quite enough to convince me that I am anything but diplomatic. And also that politics, especially international diplomatic politics, bores me intensely.


Sarakastic said...

I now have to look up garroting so I can slap your face if that happens cause im a good friend.

LEstes65 said...

I, being of questionably sound mind, do hereby promise to slap the snot out of you should any of the afore mentioned criteria be reached.

(William is getting easier to ignore as his hair thins. I am admittedly very shallow.)

Beck said...

I laughed so hard at the first one. Hmm-mmm, I know what you mean.

Stacy said...

I'm guilty of C (and I don't wish to be slapped for it). I have to be in the mood to read something depressing.

A makes me worry about your friends' taste in men. I'm pretty sure you didn't make that one up out of nowhere.

~Virginia~ said...

i don't know if i laughed harder while reading your post or sara's comment!

have a good slap-free weekend.

Stacy said...

Hey, Allie. I tagged you for a meme.

the captain said...

c = hard to avoid, good to remember!
i would add f) I ever become the sort of friend who slaps a friend in the face! :-)