taking a deep breath and calming down

Why I am now feeling happier than I was on Wednesday:

- I am actually researching a fascinating topic. Took me a while to remember that, but now that my terror has cattle-prodded me into working hard, I am starting to get really excited.

- I am not stupid; I simply am TEACHABLE. A whole lot of empty space in my head is not a bad thing. It means I have a mind that is open to different possibilities and not decided already on one conclusion.

- I actually already know a lot about my topic, given that I looked at a very similar area last year, and so I am in a much better place than most other Masters students at the same stage as me.

- Being a florist is not as romantic as I had thought. Thanks to all the sensible people who commented on my last post, pointing out all the cons of getting up early, dealing with bridezillas, slicing one's hand open with thorns, etc.

- Some people want to give me money to study. They can't be completely mistaken in my abilities, because people don't give away money generously without being very careful about it.

- Although this stage of my study (reading what everyone else has written about this subject) is not always very fun or rewarding, the stage that comes next, and takes up most of my time (looking at primary documents) will be FANTASTIC. I hope.