another meme

Remember the "YOUR NAME needs" meme? Here it is again, extended! [Just to set the record straight - I did not create this meme but borrowed it from elsewhere.] I typed the following beginnings into Google and found some interesting endings...

1. Allie looks like:
- a flat faced chicken.
- she's gone ten rounds with an unfriendly and lost.
- a cute little girl but also projects a calmness.

2. Allie likes:
- the new bookshelf. (very true)
- High School Musical. (untrue)
- balloons. (well, who doesn't?)

3. Allie says:
- keep our ears clean.
- everybody wants a thrill.
- she's not worried about the criticism.

4. Allie wants:
- to be in the Olympics. What child doesn't?
- you to be happy with every item you purchase. (Money back guarantee)
- to stay healthy, instead of eating peanuts. (Because peanuts are The ultimate temptation?)

5. Allie does:
- South America!
- the weather in a Spanish school project.
- nothing but play forum games all day long.

6. Allie hates:
- the vacuum cleaner. (So true)
- some of you. (Lies! All lies!)
- posers.

7. Allie can:
- run. (Like the wind. A really slow wind.)
- cater to almost any need BUT HEALTH ISSUES. Please do not request a spell for anything medical.
- convince you it's 8am when it's only 2:30am. (A useful skill, that.)

8. Allie goes:
- blonde.
- to the zoo.
-on strike, feeling overworked and underappreciated.

9. Allie is:
- tiniest little worker for God.
- a white flag.
- fat, illiterate.

10. Allie loves:
- dirt.
- the Isle of Skye.
- you, baby doll.

come together

I have done this kind of meme once before, but decided it was high time for another musical meme after seeing on facebook the meme of a fellow blogger who shall remain nameless but who knows who she is (gosh this is getting complex). And this one does have different questions!

What does your music library say about you?

Put Your iTunes, winamp, mp3 player or whatever on SHUFFLE.
For each question, press the next button to get your answer (no cheating).
You must write down song/artist even if it doesn't make sense.
Include any comments in parenthesis.

1. What do your friends say about you? "Rockstar", Nickelback. (A more unlikely answer I have yet to see.)

2. How would your coworkers describe you? "Here I Am to Worship", Tim Hughes

3.How would you describe yourself? "Afloat", Evermore

4. What do you like in a romantic partner? "You're the One that I Want", John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John

5. How do you feel today? "Hurt", Johnny Cash

6. What is your life’s purpose? "Break it to Pieces", Freestyle

7.What is your motto? "I Will Follow Him", from Sister Act

8. What do you think about the most? "Yesterday", the Beatles (I love this, given that I am a history student)

9. What are you going to do on your next vacation? "Rumanian Folk Dances", Bartok (I wish)

10.What do you think of your first love/date? "For Unto Us a Child is Born", from Messiah (huh?)

11. What is your life story? "Still Alive", [my big brother] (Haha - that's a real testimony, isn't it?)

12. What did you do yesterday? "Love Me Like the World is Ending", Ben Lee

13. What do you think of when you see the person you like/love? "Sexual Revolution", Macy Gray (okaaaay)

14. What describes your wedding? "In memoriam", from Les Choristes (uh-oh...)

15. What will they play at your funeral? "Everloving", Moby

16. What is your obsession? "La Vie en Rose", Louis Armstrong

17. What is your biggest fear? "Weep You No More Sad Fountains", from Sense and Sensibility

18. What is your biggest secret? "Persuasion", Tim Finn

19. What is your biggest turn-on? "Ain't No Sunshine", Bill Withers (well, this was always going to be a weird answer, wasn't it?)

20. How do you describe your friends? "The Carnival of the Animals," Saint-Saens (I love this one)

21. What would you do with a million dollars? "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For", U2

22. What is your opinion of sex? "La désillusion", from Les Choristes (another uh-oh)

23. What is your biggest regret? "Six Months in a Leaky Boat", Split Enz

24. What would you rather be doing right now? "I Love Paris", Ella Fitzgerald

25. What will you post this list as? "Come Together", Third Day

I tag anyone who wants to be tagged!

123

I've been tagged by the scintillating Stacy (I'm going through an alliteration phase, by the way).

Rules:
1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people and post a comment to the person who tagged you once you’ve posted your three sentences.

It took me a while to carry out my tag because every time I went to the computer lab I forgot to carry a book with me - but my friend K. and I have been using this meme as an excuse to procrastinate, going through all our books, because obviously what page 123 says has deep spiritual meaning for us.

From The Princess Bride, by William Goldman:

But Inigo was not surprised for long. Again his feet shifted; he moved his body a different way. Perspiration was pouring down his thin frame now and the great blade was blinding.

Hmm. Apparently I am soon to fight a duel.

Let's try again. From Feminist Theory: A Critique of Ideology (gaahhh!):

The same scientist who allowed herself to become "part of the system", whose investigations were guided by a "feeling for the organism", developed a paradigm that diverged as radically from the dominant paradigm of her field as did her methodological style.

And yes, that's only one sentence but I think that's quite enough for today. Far be it from me to attempt interpreting that.

And again... The God That Failed, a book I am reading for my research with essays by six ex-Communists.

Many young writers had joined the club because of their hope of publishing in Left Front, and when the Communist Party sent word through the fraction that the magazine should be dissolved, the writers rejected the decision, an act which was interpreted as hostility toward Party authority.
I pleaded with the Party members for a more liberal program for the club. Feeling waxed violent and bitter.

Okay... I'm young, I'm a writer, I often feel violent and bitter... is someone trying to shut down Halfway Down the Stairs??

random

Rules to this tag/meme/thing:

1. You link back to the person who tagged you. Sara of Putting the Sara in Sarakastic. Sara, I have an important question for you. Do you pronounce your name Sah-ra or Sarah?

2. Post these rules on your blog.

3. Share six unimportant things about yourself.

4. Tag six random people at the end of your entry.

5. Let the tagged people know by leaving a comment on their blogs.

This picture was labelled "Random-Apophysis_PitcherPlant.jpg" which is a mystery to me, but I found it by entering "random" into Google Images. And it's pretty.

So:

1. Today I went on a field trip with the other honours students and the Head of Department to the city archives in the public library and the museum. Not much use to me because my honours thesis is nothing to do with New Zealand or Antarctic history, but I love field trips, and old books are cool!

2. Speaking of honours theses... I am going to be researching and writing about non-Russians who went to Stalin's Russia (ie North Americans or Europeans who moved there voluntarily, unfortunate people from Eastern Europe who were plucked from their homes and sent to the gulag, POWs of WWII, possibly Jews, etc) and their impressions. But I haven't got any further than that in identifying where I'm going with it.

3. I would like to pick up the clarinet again this year, or possibly the saxophone, or alternatively continue learning German. But it's not going to happen. Sigh.

4. I have not told anyone this but I have a stupid, stupid crush on a totally inappropriate person. And by inappropriate I mean in about five separate ways. Pshsbcakcbhduwi!!! (That was me making an incomprehensible groaning/snorting sound.) Sometimes I frustrate myself very much indeed.

5. I am 21 years old and already three of my friends are married, two more are engaged, and two friends have bought houses. At least no one is pregnant yet. This state of affairs seems strange to me but perhaps it is not unusual? Please, older and wiser people, tell me how things were back in the day when you were a sprightly 21 year old.

6. I am in love with drinking tea. I have sort of gone off coffee because of it, at least, very strong or milky coffee. Tea is much more subtle. My favourite is Dilmah's Ceylon Supreme, but I also like Earl Gray or English Breakfast or Peppermint tea. This is so weird because I never thought I would be a tea drinker. The best thing about our honours room is the kettle - I am saving so much money on drinks. And the best thing about tea is that I can drink it before I go to bed without staying up half the night.

I am not going to tag anyone. Because I am exhausted and lazy and I just want to go to bed, and I can't be bothered informing people I have tagged them. But please! don't let my bad attitude put you off doing this yourself.

ten of the mostest

Here is it; my random pick of ten of the mostest.

1) Most Inane Hymn Verse:

God holds the key of all unknown, and I am glad,
If other hands should hold the key,
Or if he trusted it to me,
I might be sad (I might be sad).
We sung this at church last night and really! What a pointless verse! What is it trying to say? Absolutely nothing! It seems to me that those elderly people who complain about modern church music lacking thoughtfulness have forgotten about the existence of hymns like this. Besides that, the rhyming is dreadful.

2) Most Beautiful Bride:

Grace Kelly wedding Prince Rainier of Monaco. I was flicking through a book about this couple today at the library, saw a couple of photos of their wedding, and decided that if I looked one sixteenth as good as Princess Grace looked on my wedding day, I would be ecstatic.

3) Most Ridiculous Place Name:

This is a New Zealand one (wait for it...):
Tetaumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu.
How's that for a tongue twister!
It means: "The hilltop where Tamatea, with big knees, conqueror of mountains, eater of land, traveller over land and sea, played his Koauau (Maori flute) to his beloved".

4) Most Liked Objects in my Bedroom (clockwise from top left):

- Palm tree coat hanger which my sister Viv gave me for Christmas. I have a very small room so I've never had space for my numerous bags (Allie's favourite accessories) except on the floor. Now, problem solved! I love it!
- Bookcase. There's nothing special about the actual bookcase, but it's tall and imposing, full to bursting of my favourite books, and has a pretty paper chain I made hanging down the side.
- My lantern, which my sister Rachel gave me for Christmas. This is made out of scrap metal and came with a collection of different coloured tealights to go inside.
- My U2 concert ticket from 2006, framed. :)
- A watercolour painting of Penang, from when I went to Malaysia last year. This time I went I decided I'd like to bring home something durable and attractive, instead of just pirated DVDs and fake label clothing. When I got home I framed it, and I love it!
- Posters. One is a photo of Edvard Grieg, my favourite composer - I found it at a second hand bookshop and intend to frame it eventually. The other is the front cover of my programme from a Jacques Loussier Trio concert, with their autographs.

5) Most Amazing Photo:

I did a course at university last year called "Resistance and Conformity in Nazi Germany". Our lecturer showed us this photo, a crowd of workers doing the Nazi salute. You may need to click on it to get a larger version, but there is one man in the crowd (circled) standing with his arms folded. For all we know he may just have been scratching his elbow or something, but it looks very much as if he was making a stand. Brave, brave person. I keep this photo stuck up on my wardrobe door because if there's one thing I learnt in this course, it would be very, very easy and likely for me to be everyone else in the photo, and I would much rather be that man.

6) Most Disliked Habits of Other People:

Pressing books on me to borrow that I don't want to read. Anecdote competitions, where someone has to one-up every other person on interesting anecdotes. When driving, indicating for corners far too early (- Dad). Eating too fast or too noisily. And so on. All of which I occasionally succumb to.

7) Most Enjoyed Recent Purchase:

As I have mentioned before, my friend Jane Doe is getting married this Saturday, and it has been decided that the bridesmaids will wear silver jewellery - of which I lack anything nice. So today I went shopping at a proper jeweller's instead of my usual cheapo not-quite-so-good-quality shops. The result was this necklace; only a silver chain and silver cross, but so nice, and I loved the atmosphere of the shop with the realness and expensiveness all around me. Mmm... I think I've been hooked...

8) Most Successfully Eccentric Song:

Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody. I lurve this song.

9) Most Magical Place in New Zealand:

Mount Cook National Park. There's something about staring at the mountain over the crystal blue waters of Lake Pukaki. And then driving round the lake to the mountains; everything's so BIG, bewitching.

However, stiff competition is put up by the place pictured below, Bealey Valley (in Arthur's Pass National Park). Evenings like this one, in 2006, are not easily forgotten.

10) Most Wasteful Use of My Time:

Playing with photo software on my computer. This is supposed to be a charcoal version of me and Jane Doe. It's fun but really quite pointless.

This isn't precisely a meme as I made it up entirely by myself, but I tag anyone who wants to create their own random list of the mostest!

Next up: How To Speak Like Me (requested by Sarakastic and Jenkneebee).

it's Christmas time

Tagged by Lynette... (lestes65.blogspot.com - no linkage due to decrepit old computer that lets me do nothing)

1. List 12 random things about yourself that have to do with Christmas.
2. Please refer to it as a ‘hoopla’ and not the dreaded ‘m’-word…
3. You have to tag specific people when you’re done. No “if you’re reading this, consider yourself tagged” stuff is allowed. The number of people you tag is really up to you — but the more, the merrier to get this ‘hoopla’ circulating through the blogosphere.
4. Please try and do it as quickly as possible. The Christmas season will be over before we know it! Let’s involve as many people as possible!

Hmm, so here goes:

1. I always wake up early on Christmas Day. Even as an adult. I can't help it. It's exciting!

2. This year my Secret Santa (we have that system in my family) asked what I want and I requested either a complete surprise, Coldplay's album "Parachutes", or the Oxford Book of Carols, which is a beautiful book of singing/piano music with carols from all over the world arranged beautifully.

3. Being in the southern hemisphere, sometimes I feel like I've missed out on Christmas pop culture. I have never seen real mistletoe, mulled wine is a bit impractical at this time of year, I have no idea what eggnog contains and used to assume it was an eggplant drink, it never snows here in December unless you're on top of a mountain, it's the wrong season for holly, the list goes on. There are lots of benefits to a summer Christmas but one year I would love to spend Christmas in Germany or somewhere cold.

4. I have played both a cow and a poplar tree in nativity plays at our church. Should I explain? The first was the innkeeper in a nativity musical (the main character was Mary's donkey). And on the other occasion I was Polly Poplar, the heroine of the drama - all the other trees at the nursery were being bought as Christmas trees but I was too ugly, being a poplar, until an angel came and decorated me with Christmas lights and then I was beautiful! It's hard to pretend to cry when you have a tree costume on.

5. My mum died around Christmas time so lots of people assume Christmas must be hard for me. Actually Christmas seems to give some meaning to Mum's death, for me. Although I can totally understand that some people in similar situations find it very difficult.

6. I have two particular pet peeves about this season - people who think Christmas is an evil or unnecessary thing with pagan roots that Christians shouldn't participate in, and people who decide that since they aren't Christian they should try and stop other people from celebrating. Ie, the man in Wellington last year who rang noise control because the Salvation Army band was playing carols on the street, as they do every year, complaining it was offending him and usurping his right to religious freedom. Killjoy.

7. Another pet peeve is the Christmas music that plays in malls. Sheesh, it's already noisy and hellish enough in there without Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer or Jingle Bells playing over and over. I have never been unfortunate enough to work in a mall over Christmas but I heartily pity those who do.

8. I like waterfights and barbecues at Christmas. I know that this year we will have the latter, but everyone's too grown up for the former now, unless I enlist my nieces and nephews. Oh, and that's right - I have a cast on which I'm not allowed to get wet or walk on - looks like a fun Christmas for me.

9. My sister wrote a Christmas musical for our church one year, as part of the composition element of her music degree at uni. I still have some of the music and I still think it's really good.

10. (edited because I suddenly remembered this) One of the nicest things about getting a real tree when I was a kid was that it would always be too tall, so Dad would lop off the top with a saw. I was allowed to put it in a smaller bucket, decorate it myself, and keep it in my room as my own mini-Christmas tree. Kinda cool.

11. Last night our neighbours invited my dad and I and some other neighbours over for a Christmas barbecue. It was so nice feeling part of a little community.

12. Next year at Christmas time there will be two more members of my family.

FINIS

Edit: *scream* Must! Tag! Someone! Layling, Tusk, E., slskenyon, and Patty, if they read this. And the Ukrainian Mafia.

life lessons from literature

Some people see reading as a waste of time - I see reading as a way to gain valuable and practical life lessons, which are as follows:

1) from Pride and Prejudice - When proposing to someone, do not insult their family.

2) from The Firm, by John Grisham - If something seems too good to be true, distrust it. It is probably run by the Mafia.

3) from The Lord of the Rings, by Tolkien - Don't get too attached to your jewellery.

4) from Jane Eyre, by Charlotte Bronte - Never marry someone without checking up on their family mental history.

5) from Journey into the Whirlwind, by Evgeniya Ginzburg - Truth actually is stranger than fiction.

6) from All Quiet on the Western Front, by Erich Maria Remarque - War sucks.

7) from anything by Agatha Christie - If something bad happens, always suspect the most unlikely person, OR anyone with an airtight alibi.

8) from Bridget Jones' Diary by Helen Fielding - Never date cads.

9) from I Capture the Castle, by Dodie Smith - A surefire way to get rid of writer's block is to get someone to lock you in a tower until you've written five pages.

10) from Darkness at Noon, by Arthur Koestler - Logic is not all it's cracked up to be.

11) from the Bible - God is nice and he likes me.

So there you go. I tag anyone who likes books (or, if you prefer, movies or TV).

By the way - last night we went down to the beach for fish and chips with some friends. It was about thirty degrees (celsius) and there was no wind. Result: FLIES. It was horrible. The sort of thing that should be a Hitchcock movie. And as soon as the fish and chips were ready, it was like we were surrounded by hundreds of flies. We had to eat through tiny holes in the paper and even then I think I only managed about six chips and a quarter of a fish before I was just too sickened to go on. There's nothing like a swarm of Australian flies to kill an appetite.

if only...

The tag I couldn't resist - from Jenkneebee who got it from Beck who got it from someone else - Ten Literary Characters I Would Totally Make Out With If I Were Single... which I am but I am not resident in a book, movie or television show.

1) Henry Tilney of Jane Austen's Northanger Abbey. He is my first choice Austen hero, the coolest and wittiest man she wrote, I think. For example:
"And now, Henry," said Miss Tilney, "that you have made us understand each other, you may as well make Miss Morland understand yourself -- unless you mean to have her think you intolerably rude to your sister, and a great brute in your opinion of women in general. Miss Morland is not used to your odd ways."
"I shall be most happy to make her better acquainted with them."
"No doubt; -- but that is no explanation of the present."
"What am I to do?"
"You know what you ought to do. Clear your character handsomely before her. Tell her that you think very highly of the understanding of women."
"Miss Morland, I think very highly of the understanding of all the women in the world -- especially of those -- whoever they may be - with whom I happen to be in company."
"That is not enough. Be more serious."
"Miss Morland, no one can think more highly of the understanding of women than I do. In my opinion, nature has given them so much that they never find it necessary to use more than half."

2) Dobbin, from Vanity Fair. I get so annoyed with Amelia for most of the novel for not noticing how great Dobbin is.
3) The Phantom. Okay, so he murders people and kidnaps young opera singers - but it's a well-known fact that troubled musicians are irresistible! And despite the apparent ugliness, there is something super attractive about him - Gerard Butler's version at least.
4) The Sound of Music's Captain von Trapp. Yum-yum! Dance with me, Georg!
5) Inevitably, Mr Darcy. Quite apart from Colin Firth, Mr Darcy as a fictional character is very attractive at times.

6) Daniel Cleaver of Bridget Jones' Diary. Okay - bad choice, I know, and totally not the sort of guy I'd be attracted to in real life. I think most girls are secretly attracted to Daniel Cleaver types, though; there's something a bit dangerous about him which appeals.

7) Dr Who. A recent addition to my fictional crushes roll of honour as I move steadily and surely towards becoming a dork. David Tennant is a particularly great Dr Who; charismatic, exciting, slightly odd.
8) Mr Rochester of Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre. Of all my list, this is the one I most wish was not fictional. Mr Rochester is written as ugly, but he comes across as so powerful and magnetic a personality that you can't help wishing that. Recent TV adaptation with Toby Stephens as Mr Rochester - very successful.
9) Captain Frederick Wentworth, of Austen's Persuasion. Silly of me to have three Austen characters on my list, but I couldn't resist. There's always something about a man in a uniform. And a man who knows how to write a good letter.

10) Faramir, from The Lord of the Rings. In the books, Faramir is one of those minor characters who turns out to be a really good guy (he's the one who ends up with Eowyn). I think it's a pity he's not made much of in the movies, but I definitely had a crush on him by the end of Return of the King.

books

Thanks to Stacy for her latest tagging, of this book meme.

Total number of books? Unfortunately I can't answer this one because almost all of my books are at home in New Zealand while I'm over here in Oz. I had to be ruthless when packing so I brought with me only about three books, to read on the plane. Since I got here, I've bought about ten to fifteen books, mostly secondhand Agatha Christies! I would guess I probably have at least two hundred at home.

Last book read? One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich, by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn. This was a book that my former history lecturer who will next year be my supervisor said I really should read if I want to study the Soviet purges, along with a few others. I find Russian lit so daunting that it took me a long time to get around to it, but when I eventually did get it out of the library, I found myself really engrossed. I had to interrupt my reading a few times for lunch or dinner and found myself absolutely amazed at how delicious the food was, even the most basic snack such as carrot sticks, because I had become so caught up in this portrayal of a gulag (especially its food).

Last book bought? This was actually the book I wrote about last post (Lost in Austen) so I'll mention the book I bought before that - First Among Sequels, by Jasper Fforde. This is the latest Thursday Next novel released, and it's no disappointment. I don't know how to even start describing this series of books because it's just so wild - all I can say is, if you're a fan of literature and comedy, you really should read these books, starting with The Eyre Affair.

Five meaningful books?

1) The Great Gatsby, by F. Scott Fitzgerald. We had to read this book for school in Year 13, and ever since then, this has been one of my benchmarks for how a book should be written. I don't know if everyone would agree with me or not, but it seems to me Fitzgerald captured the perfect tone.

2) Persuasion, by Jane Austen. Something I find quite strange is that this is one of the least popular Austen novels. Stacy wouldn't agree with me! But personally, I think this book is Austen's most thoughtful and mature work, with some of the best characterisation. Being more mature doesn't mean it loses any of its humour, either. As Jane Austen is my favourite author and I want to be Just Like Her (well, actually, I don't want to be exactly like her but that's another story), this novel is very important to me and my favourite novel full stop.

3) The short stories of Katherine Mansfield. I am sad Mansfield never wrote a novel but her short stories, especially those set in New Zealand, are some of my favourite pieces of literature. I love her style and tone and subject matter - she doesn't make a big deal of plot but somehow her stories are irresistible anyway. Most of all, I love that she is an author who wrote from a New Zealand perspective and also wrote really well - there are not a huge amount of good (or at least well-known) New Zealand authors out there but I would like to be one of them one day, and Mansfield's work encourages me that it can be done.

4) The Collected Short Stories of Roald Dahl. These creepy and rather macabre stories are so clever and so well thought out that I can't seem to get enough of them. Dahl was a master of The Twist, and I really love how he avoids telling us exactly what happens, and how this seems to make it even creepier. I wish I could one day be clever enough to write like him.

5) The Ordinary Princess, by M. M. Kaye. I haven't exactly chosen a genre yet but I think that if I ever make it as an author, I'd really like to write at least one children's book. Children's lit doesn't seem to get a lot of serious attention, but this fantastic little fairy tale taught me that just because a book is written for children doesn't mean it has to be any less well written or clever or funny.

the president and me

Thanks, Stacy, for this meme idea which is just about the most fun meme ever! Here's my contribution.

Finally, if you have time and you haven't done so yet, please vote on my poll on the destination I should choose to visit in Western Australia - you will find photos and a quick list of the pros and cons of each in my last blog post.

world domination

The World Domination Meme, thanks to Stacy:

You are offered one superhero power to help you take over the world (or the country of your choice). What would your superpower be and why?

My superpower would be the power to appear to each person as their greatest ideal, eg to be a sort of reverse Boggart. This would make everyone vote for me and think that I was democratically elected rather than a tyrannical dictator, and if I was careful, it would prohibit all forms of resistance.

Where will you establish your capital and why?

Unfortunately, I believe local domination is too small an aim; world domination alone can satisfy. Therefore, Christchurch is just too small and far away from everywhere to be the capital of my global empire as it is. All the same, I don't want to have it anywhere else because that would be an insult to the glory that is Christchurch. Therefore, I will have the South Island of New Zealand dug up, and towed to a more convenient location.

What would be your first official decree as a brand new dictator? Why?

I would announce a ban on rogaine, because it is a fallacy of a sport and a crime.

As a Great and Fearsome Leader, you will need to have the best people working for you. Who would work for you? (Feel free to use famous people, fictional characters, friends and family, or other people from the blogosphere in your answer.) What would their jobs be?

My Deputy will be Stacy, because she is obviously adept in handling minions and dominating the world. She will also understand that I am ruthless, can read minds, and that the moment she starts considering usurping me, being sent to the gulag will be the least of her worries.

Lady Catherine de Bourgh from Pride and Prejudice will be my Chief of Police because she is a seriously scary and ruthless old woman.

My entire family will be given high-paying jobs in government departments which involve hardly any work, because what is the use of dominating the world if you can't be a nepotist?

My niece Ruby will be my PR person because she is so cute that everyone will take one look at her and forget about the thousands toiling in the gulag that they had come to complain about.

Henry Tilney from Northanger Abbey will be the chaplain, because he's the coolest clergyman that has yet been seen in a novel.

Peter Jackson will be in charge of Propaganda. Bono and the Edge will set pro-Allie rhymes to music. Rachmaninov, Grieg and Mendelssohn will collaborate on pro-Allie symphonies and operas.

If you could make one annoying habit illegal in your empire, what would it be?

Wearing those condom-like hats that rappers wear in music videos.

me

I have been tagged by the talented Stacy (if only her name began with a T) and this is the result!

What were you doing 10 years ago?

I was a ten year old obsessed with my new niece and getting over an obsession with Enid Blyton! (Actually this niece has just turned ten - scary!) I was in Mr McDonald's class at Hoon Hay Primary School, I had recorder and piano lessons, and I played Bad Bill in our school's play 'Granny and the Pirates'.

What were you doing 5 years ago?

Five years ago I was fifteen, and visiting Malaysia with my parents to see my brother. I was at Middleton Grange School, taking Maths, English, Science, French, Art and Music. I had two best friends called Sarah and Hayley, and we did not have any major dramas that year, unlike the previous two.

What were you doing 1 year ago?

Studying hard - History, English and Linguistics. Trying not to spend money. Trying not to eat too much junk food. Agonising over a boy I had met.

What are 5 snacks you enjoy?

1. Chocolate (no surprises there), especially Nestle Coconut Double Blend, and Whittakers Almond.
2. Jelly. (As in Jello???)
3. Yoghurt. (Or, jelly and yoghurt mixed together!)
4. Rice crackers and salsa.
5. Cruskits (a type of cracker) with Marmite and cheese.

What are 5 songs that you know the lyrics to by heart?

1. I Have Confidence, from The Sound of Music (I was singing this in the car last night all the way home from the movie theatre!)
2. Sixteen Going on Seventeen, from The Sound of Music, again (funniest song EVER to sing)
3. When Peace Like A River, the hymn by Philip Bliss
4. Pride (in the Name of Love), U2
5. Stranded at the Drive-in, from Grease (again, a very funny song to sing)

What are 5 things you would do if you were a millionaire?

1. Travel. Anywhere. In so doing, find worthy causes to give money to.
2. Build up an extensive library all of my own.
3. Buy a grand piano.
4. Volunteer with Amnesty International full-time.
5. Learn to play a ridiculous amount of musical instruments.

What are 5 bad habits?

1. Being judgmental of Austen movies and ruining them for my friends, who can sense my displeasure radiating from me. However, you will be glad to hear that before I went to see Becoming Jane last night, I made up my mind to look at it merely as a movie rather than a historically accurate record, and found myself enjoying it very much.
2. Getting crushes on inappropriate people.
3. Being a bit snobbish about people with different interests.
4. Whinging whenever I get tired/wet/cold.
5. Forgetting to stop talking about myself to certain people. You know the type, who are so caring that they always ask you about yourself and you suddenly realise you didn't ask them about their sick mother or something.

What are 5 things you like doing?

1. Playing the piano loudly.
2. Friendly arguments.
3. Childish things like going to zoos, watching children's movies, making sand castles.
4. Drinking coffee.
5. Fast and efficient but extravagant shopping.

What are 5 things you would never wear again?

1. Grey tracksuit pants with a matching sweatshirt.
2. Skivvies.
3. Denim waistcoats.
4. Crushed velvet.
5. Teddy-bear hat.

What are your 5 favorite toys?

1. I'm going to copy Stacy here - my laptop.
2. iPod.
3. Playmobil. I haven't played with it for ages, but I wish I was still young enough to get it out at any opportunity.
4. Hair straightener.
5. Book case. Sounds weird, but I love arranging and rearranging my books. :)

Who are the five people you're tagging?

They've all been taken already, so ANYONE!

hooray for lots of things

Firstly, hooray for tags! Thanks, Lynette!

1 Where is your cell phone? hidden
2 Relationship? invisible
3 Your hair? dry
4 Work? absent
5 Your sisters? cool!
6 Your favorite things? music
7 Your dream last night? decongestant
8 Your favorite drink? milk
9 Your dream car? Mini
10 The room you're in? cold
11 Your shoes? muddy
12 Your fears? childcare
13 What do you want to be in 10 years? author
14 Who did you hang out with this weekend? Christians
15 What are you not good at? soccer
16 Muffins? savoury
17 Wish-list item? genius
18 Where you grew up? Aotearoa
19 The last thing you did? exam
20 What are you wearing? slippers
21 What are you not wearing? braces
22 Your pet? kaput
23 Your computer? slow
24 Your life? confusing
25 Your mood? sick
26 Missing? Mum
27 What are you thinking about? travelling
28 Your car? sluggish
29 Your kitchen? scented
30 Your summer? late
31 Your favorite color? green
32 Last time you laughed? movie
33 Last time you cried? movie
34 School? over!
35 Love? piano
36 Tag? anyone

Secondly, I sat my last exam this morning, and I have officially finished my BA! If I didn't have my horrendous triannual cold, I would be celebrating. Of course, I'm coming back for Honours. And I haven't got my marks or a certificate yet so of course, theoretically, I don't have my BA. But it seems like a bit of a milestone to finish all the work I'll ever have to do for my first degree :)

Thirdly, Sara has posted one of the coolest short stories I have ever read. Totally made my day.

Fourthly, we had roast lamb and roast vegetables for dinner. Mmmmm! That just makes the fact that it is the shortest day of the year (and freezing cold) so much more bearable.

meme

Thank you, Stacy, for the latest meme/tag/interview/whatever they're called - although I understand she stole it off someone else!!

1. Go back to first or early post. How would you describe your voice back in those early days? Who were you writing to? What was your sense of audience (if any) back then?

My voice, back in the day (2004)? In one word: immature. I quote: "I finished school about a month ago FOREVER and my friends and I met up at a SERIOUS cafe today. I felt very grown-up." Ahhh, to think of the days when I capitalised everything. Now I am much more mature, I italicise things instead. I also listed all the presents I got for Christmas, and what I got for my family - definitely a mark of a younger Allie, I think.
Likewise, I was much more obsessed with U2 and Jane Austen than I am now!
And... sadly... I was rather preachy.
Although overall I wasn't terrible. Just a bit boring.

I'm not sure who exactly I was writing to. I used to talk a lot about The Spirit Of The Internet back then - basically because no one read my blog! I didn't tell anyone about it, I didn't know anyone who had a blog, and I was too lazy to search out other blogs. I had, basically, absolutely no sense of audience - but I don't think I minded too much at first, because it meant I could write whatever I wanted. But after a while, it began to really grate on me that no one read it... more on this next question.

2. Do you remember when you received your first comment?

My first ever comment was a junk one. Depressing. As I said before, I didn't mind too much at first - but then when I was going through the hardest time of my life, back in 2005, I would pour out my heart on my blog, and the only response I would get would be "Great blog! Come look at my cheap deals on Viagra" and that was super-depressing.

My first real comment (as far as I can remember) was when I started searching through random blogs, and I found this great photo blog. I left a comment saying he'd inspired me to start posting my own photos, and he came and left a really nice comment on my blog. Soon later, a visitor to his blog came to mine, and she became a regular for a long time (that's Patty of Green Tea Obsession).

3. Can you point to a stage where you began to feel that your blog might be part of a conversation? Where you might be part of a larger community of interacting writers?

Yes - this started when Stacy started blogging, funnily enough! (Thanks Stacy) Because I knew Stacy already, through our online critiquing group, it was natural to visit her blog a lot, and somehow, slowly, I got connected with a whole lot of people who visited her blog or whose blogs she visited.

Before this, I'd had a few people visiting my blog fairly regularly, such as Patty, or slskenyon, but these were nearly all isolated from each other, so it wasn't nearly so interesting. But now it is very very fun! And I feel like I have friends all over the world! I also love how this 'community' of bloggers passes around the same memes and we can all check out each others' answers. :)

4. Do you think that this sense of audience or community might have affected the way you began to write?

Definitely. Once I knew there were people actually reading my blog, I was much more careful about trying to write things that were actually interesting. Ie, I had to stop writing things like 'I'm bored and I can't think of anything to do so I'm writing on my blog'. Sometimes I still do that... but only once a month.

I was also a lot more careful about sharing religious opinions. As it happens, most of the people who read my blog are Christians, anyway. But I felt like this blog should be a neutral sort of place, although as you've probably noticed I don't necessarily hide my beliefs. So when I got sick of this, I created another blog, God is Nice, and I write on there whenever I feel the urge to splurge my current ideas on/experiences of God.

Stacy in her version of this meme mentioned that she didn't mind her family reading this but not other acquaintances. I feel the opposite, really. I've never given my blog address to mere acquaintances, but I don't mind giving it to close friends, whom I wouldn't feel the need to gripe about. Whereas I'm not so thrilled when I know that a member of my family has read it. I don't know why, but if I'm going through something that has ripped me apart, I'd rather I told them myself than they had to read it on here. Again, I don't usually do so, because - again - this blog feels, to me, like it should be neutral and relatively carefree. So to get away from this problem, I made another blog called Another Grief Observed, on which I could vent on a particular issue whenever I wanted to, and for a long time I didn't leave a link to it on this blog or on my profile.

It's definitely worked really well for me having a number of blogs. Even if I'm having a crappy day, I can come on here and make fun of it. But I can be as dieaway and miserable on another or as new agey on yet another as I want. Even when I'm really busy I love blogging; it really helps me to relax, for some reason.

M

Stacy has kindly given me the letter 'M' to make a list of ten things I like! I just love these sorts of tags.

1. Mount Cook/Aoraki. I've only been here twice, unfortunately, but it is probably my favourite place in New Zealand. It's our biggest mountain, in fact the biggest in the southern hemisphere, and has a whole national park named after it. It has this startling blue lake in front of it and when you stand on one side looking across to the mountain it looks exactly like one of those fairy tale scenes where you paddle across an enchanted lake to heaven - in my opinion. And then you drive around the lake to the mountains, and everything's just so big and still and noise just gets swallowed up, and the air is so fresh, and you actually feel like going on a very long walk!

2. Music. I know this is really very broad, but I think if there was one thing I would not be willing to lose, it would be music, almost all types of it, and my ability to play it. And that's all I have to say, because I just can't describe music.

3. Milly-Molly-Mandy. Did anyone else love these books whilst growing up? Because I adored them! The little adventures she had were so simple, but made such great stories, and the illustrations were perfect. I used to copy everything Milly-Molly-Mandy did. In one story, she grew her own cress, so I grew cress too. In another, she had baked potatos with stuffing, so I did too. In another, she let a little basket down from her second storey window, and people left gifts in it, so I did that too - many, many times. In another, she made one of those miniature gardens in a bowl, which became a favourite pastime of mine. And so on and so forth.

4. Masochism is Always Funny, Stacy's wonderful novel! Although I have not read the final version, I feel I can safely recommend it as a must-have and future classic of English literature. (Does this score me Brownie points, Stacy?)

5. Madeira, M'Dear. This is my favourite song by Flanders and Swann, two British comedians/songwriters from a few decades ago. It's about a dodgy old man who tries to get a girl drunk on Madeira so he can... you-know-what. It's the funniest and cleverest song ever, in my opinion. If you haven't heard it, you are missing out.

6. Murder mysteries. Whether they are by Agatha Christie, Arthur Conan Doyle, G. K. Chesterton, or anyone else for that matter. I can't seem to get enough of these. I love figuring out who the villain is and trying to anticipate the twist.

7. The 'momentany' quote in A Midsummer Night's Dream. I wrote an essay in my first year of uni on this passage, and I love this part of it (I, i, 140-149):
Hermia: O hell!-to choose love by another's eyes.
Lysander: Or if there were a sympathy in choice,
War, death or sickness did lay siege to it,
Making it momentany as a sound,
Swift as a shadow, short as any dream,
Brief as the lightning in the collied night,
That, in a spleen, unfolds both heaven and earth,
And, ere a man hath power to say 'Behold!',
The jaws of darkness do devour it up.
So quick bright things come to confusion.

8. Messiah. This has two parts to it. Obviously, I really quite like the Messiah, as in Jesus Christ. He died for me, which demands some attention. I also like Handel's Messiah, the oratorio. I go to hear it every year!

9. Malaysian food. My brother and family live in Penang, Malaysia, and my parents and I went to visit them when I was fifteen. Malaysians are very, very lucky, because they have very cheap, amazing food, and a selection of about three or four nationalities represented there to choose from. Malaysian: laksa... Indian: masala dosa... roti canai... mango lassi... tandoori chicken... Chinese: steamboat... The list goes on. And then there's the fruit there - mangoes, lychees, and so on. Deep-fried bananas. The dessert served on the beach of fruit covered in shaved ice and condensed milk. The only downside - if you go, you may be forced to try durian, which is about the most horrible culinary (and sensory) experience I have ever had.

10. Marshmallows. Especially melted between chocolate biscuits, or dipped into chocolate fondue. Right. I'm going to have to go buy some now.

more meme

Three cheers for Sarakastic, who has created another DIY meme! This one has the added distinction of having, apparently, the most abrupt ending ever. It's also exciting because it's like a chain letter where a question gets added on every time. I don't know about everyone else, but I used to religiously post off chain letters to eight people every time I got one, and waited in vain for the replies/gifts they were meant to send back. Anyway! Here is Sara's meme, unedited and uncensored (I think things always sound more rebellious when you say that):

1. If you could travel back in time & kick anyone, who would it be & why?
President Woodrow Wilson. This may seem quite a random choice, but given my immersion over the last year or so in the history of the world wars, it's actually kind of relevant for me. If Wilson hadn't gone all hippy in 1918 with his Fourteen Points about how everyone should hold hands in peace and be compassionate and be fair to nationalities and not embittered, a whole lot of expectations would not have been raised (which, incidentally, he never meant or could have been able to fulfil), the Treaty of Versailles may not have been such a shock to Germany, and Hitler may not have come to power - although, of course, that's all speculation, hindsight is 20/20, etc etc. He also should have persuaded the US Senate to actually support the Treaty they had been a major part of making and weakening, as then it could actually have been workable. In my opinion. Can I kick them as well? [For more info on the basics see the Wikipedia page]

Of course, it may make more sense to travel back in time and kick Hitler. I just doubt that would make much difference to an egotistical evil sadistic maniac who would probably just have me shot/hung/tortured/gassed anyway. But it would have been immensely satisfying.

2. When people mistake your name for another name, what is it?
I'm Alison, usually Allie, in reality - but there's a woman at my church who persists in calling me Alice, even though I've told her a million times that it's not my name. One time I did get a popstar to sign my diary, and when he spelt my name, he wrote 'Illie'. Which is a bit weird.

3. If you could add any question to this Meme what would it be?
What would you never sue someone for? (Just because I can't think of anything poignant or amusing to ask, and I'm actually interested.)

In other news, my friend Sarah and I have finally met up with our old school friend Hayley whom I mentioned a few blog posts ago for coffee tonight. We were so nervous, but from the moment we met her again it was just like old times - except we're all five years older - and there was no awkwardness whatsoever. It was really, really nice. Hooray!

stacy's very own meme

Stacy, ashamed of her score on another meme, has created her very own meme, and I'm allowed to do it too because I like flying kites!

Stacy’s Book Meme (to include plays, short stories, and poems as well as novels)

Directions:

Use blue font for everything you’ve read
Use red font for everything you’ve started but never finished
Use purple font for everything you’ve read but wish you hadn’t
Use yellow font for everything you’d never read, even you and that book were the only things to survive the apocalypse
Use black font for things you’ve never read (I'm using white because it shows up better on my blog)
Use green front for things you want to read
Use orange font if you’ve read the author but not that particular work

The Bible
Medea, Euripides
Oedipus Rex, Sophocles
Odyssey, Homer
The Canterbury Tales, Geoffrey Chaucer
The Inferno, Dante Alighieri
A Midsummer Night’s Dream, William Shakespeare
Tartuffe, Moliere
Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, Samuel Taylor Coleridge
The Eve of St. Agnes, John Keats
Frankenstein, Mary Shelley
Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte
The Scarlet Letter, Nathaniel Hawthorne
Moby Dick, Herman Melville
Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
Little Women, Louise May Alcott
War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy
Madame Bovary, Gustave Flaubert
The Count of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
The Awakening, Kate Chopin
The Turn of the Screw, Henry James
Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll
Ulysses, James Joyce
Anne of Green Gables, L.M. Montgomery
The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald
The Sun Also Rises, Ernest Hemingway
The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck
Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
The Sound and the Fury, William Faulkner
The Fellowship of the Ring, J.R.R. Tolkien
To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
Lord of the Flies, William Golding
The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger
Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, Tennessee Williams
The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath
A Good Man is Hard to Find, Flannery O’Connor
Their Eyes Were Watching God, Zora Neale Hurston
Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been? Joyce Carol Oates
Love in the Time of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez
White Noise, Don DeLillo
The Bluest Eye, Toni Morrison
The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie
White Teeth, Zadie Smith
Middlesex, Jeffrey Eugenides
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, Michael Chabon
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, JK Rowling
Everything is Illuminated, Jonathan Safran Foer
Gilead, Marilynne Robinson

Optional:
Untitled Memoir, Trish Ryan
Masochism is Always Funny: a Novel, Stacy Brazalovich

answers from the cosmos

I have decided to repeat today a meme which I did last year, tagged by Patty of Green Tea Obsession, simply because it was rather fun, in the manner of fortune cookies or those paper things you used to fold and write things on as a kid to tell your future, and I'm interested to see what results I'll get this time!

The Rules: Go to your music player of choice & put it on shuffle. The song which pops up when you press play is the answer to that question!

1. How does the world see me? Miss Sarajevo - U2

Is that a compliment... or not?

2. Will I have a happy life? If I Could - Jack Johnson

Hmm... another answer that doesn't sound so great.

3. What do my friends think of me? Sounding Brass - Flanders and Swann

:) I guess I need to stop bragging.

4. Do I have a secret admirer? Sunday Bloody Sunday - U2

This is one of the answers that I'm just not too sure if the cosmos heard me properly. Maybe it thought I said, 'do I have a secret shame' or something.

5. How can I make myself happy? Faithful - Brooke Fraser

That makes sense.

6. What should I do with my life? A Thing Called Love - Johnny Cash

Awww... that's nice.

7. Will I ever have children? Surely he hath borne our griefs - from Handel's Messiah

Hahaha! I laughed so hard at this.

8. What is some good advice for me? Stoppin' the Love - KT Tunstall

Hey! Hang on a minute! I thought the cosmos told me two answers ago that I had to spend my life starting the love!

9. What do I think my current theme song is? So Much 2 Say - Take 6

Hmm. I think the cosmos is getting a bit rusty. Actually I haven't had much to say at all over the last few days, evidenced by my lack of blogging except for tags that I've done before!

10. What does everyone else think my current theme song is? Better - Regina Spektor

Sure hope so.

11. What song will play at my funeral? Vertigo - U2

This seems to be decidedly inappropriate for a funeral... but who am I to question the wisdom of the cosmos?

12. How will I be remembered? Smile - Lily Allen

That's rather nice.

13. What type of men do I like? Kiss from a Rose - Seal

We-ell. I hope that doesn't mean I'm going to fall in love with a pretty, SNAGish boy.

14. What is my day going to be like? Entertaining Angels - Newsboys

Suits me just fine.

Well, there you have it. I tag anyone who wants to do it who has access to a music player that you can shuffle.

This was going to be a ranting post (I'm on holiday, technically, but I have to write two essays by the thirtieth that I am having huge trouble motivating myself for, so whenever I'm awake I'm either doing homework, or feeling bad because I'm not doing homework. And my conscience, or perhaps those angels I'm entertaining, is pressuring me to do something I really don't want to do but know I have to. And the zip on my favourite pair of jeans, which I paid $20 to have repaired three weeks ago, has broken again). But then I realised that I have absolutely no right to rant about anything at the moment, given all the good things in my life. (Just noticed that somehow I managed to do it anyway. Ignore it, please.) Things I am thankful for right now:

- not being shot by a crazed gunman

- the chance to study and get a degree, which probably puts me in about the most privileged 1% in the world

- close family and friends

- music

- the chance to travel

my numerous and complex needs

Stacy has tagged me with this great meme - all you have to do is type your name + 'needs' into google, and suddenly all your priorities become clear! Fun fun fun.

- Allie needs to walk through a greenhouse full of fragrant flowers.

Naturally.

- Allie needs a lot of personal attention to make her feel more secure, so that she won't feel she has to bully the other cats to establish her place in the household.

That's right. Purrrrrrr.

- What a surprise when the frog shows up again, just when Allie needs it.

I will keep that in mind in the future.

- Allie needs to be slapped so bad, and I'm just the gal to do it.

Uh-oh... I must think fast - who have I offended?

- Wackie-Allie needs to check herself into a mental institution she sounds like she would stalk a man to make a baby.

You know it.

- allie needs to feel the vibrations.

.... I'm not quite sure what to make of this.

- Playing with ghosts can be dangerous, so Allie needs all her detective skills.

That's right! I'm a real detective, in the manner of Father Brown, Sherlock Holmes, Hercule Poirot and Miss Marple!

- Allie needs help getting her pants off.

No comment.

It was surprising to find ones that were actually true:

- allie NEEDS that caffene!!!

- allie needs a haircut

Complementary needs:

- allie needs a boyfriend

- allie needs to be wit ME. ... allie can be with me if she wants to.

I daresay, but it would be helpful to know who you are!

Last but not least and probably the most apt:

- Lord knows Allie needs her Jesus. On that note, happy Easter, everyone. [I love being a day ahead of all of you!]

I tag JenKneeBee and Layling :)

October 30... day of infamy...

So, Stacy's tagged me to do this birthday meme. It involves typing your date of birth into google (which, in my case is 30 October)! Pretty simple really, so here goes:

List three events that happened that day

1) 1938 - Orson Welles broadcasts his radio play of H. G. Wells's War of the Worlds, causing a nationwide panic. I'd never heard of this before but thought it rather amusing!
2) 1961 - Due to "violations of Lenin's precepts", it is decreed that Josef Stalin's body be removed from its place of honour inside Lenin's tomb and buried near the Kremlin wall with a plain granite marker instead. Given my interest in Soviet Russia, this seemed a good choice for an event.
3) 2005 - The rebuilt Dresden Frauenkirche (destroyed in the firebombing of Dresden during World War II) is reconsecrated after a thirteen-year rebuilding project. And I just thought this was kinda cool.

List two important birthdays
1) 1821 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, Russian writer. Hooray! I had thought for years that no one cool was born on my birthday. But there could be nothing cooler than sharing a birthday with Dostoevsky, in my humble, literature-student opinion.
2) 1885 - Ezra Pound, American poet. That's a little bit cool too, but not quite as cool as Dostoevsky.

List 1 death
1968 - Rose Wilder Lane. I chose her because she was literally the only person on the list whose name I knew. Is it right to be depressed that no one amazingly important has died on your birthday?

List a holiday or observance
International Orthopaedic Nurses Day. Part-ay! The other option was 'Mischief Night' in the USA.

Well, maybe this post doesn't quite live up to the promising title. So sue me.

I am about the most tired I have been since ever right now. I am pushing myself very hard at uni and with my tutoring and so on and I'm wondering how long I can keep it up. It is the first time ever that I have drunk about five large caffeine-sodden drinks in one day without feeling any effects whatsoever except the unwanted ones. Please tell me I'm not alone! Actually, don't do that. I want to be the only busy person in the world so that I can gripe as much as I like and everyone else will only look at me admiringly and whisper to each other about how hard-working and humble I am. I think that will be another law in my tyrannical dictatorship. Never be busier than Allie, or it's the gulag for you.